Too Tired to Think


I. am. utterly. worn. out. I don’t know what’s gotten into me this past week or so, but I am exhausted. Absolutely exhausted. I drink coffee in the morning and then a glass or two of iced green tea, so it’s not as if I’m not getting any caffeine! And yet, I am still completely run-down. I mean, there has been a lot of excitement going on around here. We just signed a lease for our first house! I had a personal record run of 6.02 miles! I found out one of my best friends is preggers! But I’ve also been getting decent amounts of sleep. So who knows. I am still sticking with the point that I feel great while working out but awful when I’m not. But I can’t work out all day, not with a full time job and not with the life that we’ll be living over the next month or so between traveling and packing and moving and working!

Wednesday at 4:15PM I have a follow up appointment with my Rheumy. I am hoping and hoping and hoping that he tells me it’s ok to go back on Enbrel. The Nambumetone just doesn’t seem to cut it and I’ve been really sore these past few weeks.

For the first time though, I am scared that I may not be able to do it all.

Classes started today. The national workgroups that I’m leading at work start this week. Calculus still has to be completed. We need to pack up the apartment. We need to find a subletter. We need to move. I don’t know if I can do it all. I’m scared that I won’t finish Calc and I’ll get kicked out of Grad School. I’m scared that I’ll fall flat on my face while leading a workgroup. I’m scared that I’ll fall behind in class because I’ll be too tired to do the readings and take part in the discussions. I’m worried we won’t find a subletter. I’m worried we won’t have anyone to help us move. I’m stressed out and I feel like crap.

Somehow things will work out…


4 responses »

  1. Two things: (1) Did you end up talking to your school’s disability department? Because it is better to get in their system before you really need the help. Even if you don’t need the help/accommodations now, it’s a good thing to do – just in case. It might give you some peace of mind. And (2) guess what? If you can’t do it all that’s ok. It really, really is. You can always change your mind or do things more slowly. You really can. ~;o) And those are my two cents.

  2. Mariah’s “two cents” resonate with me.
    Regarding your classes….. you will find that your school’s resource disability dept. to be exceedingly supportive. There’s such comfort in knowing they are there for you, if you need them.

  3. Thank you to both of you :0) I still need to contact disability services- will do that over the next few weeks and I am feeling better- I am taking a look at all of the pieces and I think I have some logical paths forward now.

  4. Pingback: Stress. Stress. Stress. « Taking the World by Storm

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