Yesterday, I had a general check-in with my Rheumatologist to check and see how the Enbrel and Prednisone pack had worked out and in general how I was feeling. I never before arriving that I was going to have to deal with labs. For some folks, having blood drawn is as easy as brushing your teeth. I am NOT one of those people.
You probably remember from some of my previous posts, just how much I
dislike HATE DISDAIN LOATHE being pricked with needles (in fact the post was entitled,I hate needles. seriously.”… which is actually rather humorous considering I have to inject myself once a week (although sure click self injectors ARE MUCH BETTER than syringes, I will say).
I don’t know what it is, but I could never handle watching people have needles stuck into their arms or hands- it makes me queasy, uneasy, and nauseous. In fact, even as I was looking for an image to include in this post, I tried to find one of someone having blood drawn and I started to feel all clammy and nauseous. Thus, you are stuck with an SI joint image- because well, the SI is important to me :0)
So back to my appointment. I checked in and my Rheumy told me that we should keep on the path and see if Enbrel can’t continue to improve my situation. If by the next time I come in, I do not significantly improve, we will look for another method (I am confident that Enbrel will work). I will continue on with my Voltaren gel as well as my Nambumetone. I also talked to him about my stupid cold sore. I got it last weekend and it’s hanging around. He told me that it should go away soon, wrote me a prescription, and told me that prevalence of cold sores is normal (whatever “normal” is). In addition, he inspected a hard lump that I discovered under my right lower jaw and determined that it appears to be an infected lymph node. Bacteria gets into the cold sore and infects your lymph nodes (awesome). Again, it should get better on its own over time, but if it doesn’t, I’m supposed to let him know.
Then he said that phrase that I l.o.a.t.h.e.: Did I get labs last time you were here? No I replied in a very sad quiet voice. He chuckled and said we should get them and go from there. So, I begrudgingly went out to the nurse’s station and sat in my chair and instantly felt the anxiety coming on. I tried to push it out of mind reminding myself that the last two times, I didn’t black out at all. The nurse was super friendly and put the needle in quickly and started talking to me. In an effort to avoid the “black spots”, I looked up at the ceiling. Everything was fine until it wasn’t.
All of the sudden I felt myself passing out. I state such and then what happened next is really hard to explain. I felt a jerky sensation and everything was moving really fast and I couldn’t stop my body from “freaking out.” Then everything went dark. I woke up to smelling salts, 4 nurses, and my doctor standing over me asking me if I was ok and how did I feel, etc. They had my legs hoisted into the air (thank god I wore pants, right?) and brought out orange juice, the blood pressure machine, chocolate, and fluids. They proceeded to get me right side up and seated and then calmly said that I had experienced a mini seizure. That they could be brought on by extreme stress and anxiety. It was one of the scariest moments of my life. I don’t like not having control. Yesterday, I lost control. I would prefer not to have that feeling ever again.
So, a while later, I left the doctor’s office with their consent that I was OK. I went straight to the deli and got a sandwich. Then I felt terrible all day yesterday. Now I don’t ever want to go back to that office again but I know I will and I will freak out the next time I get blood drawn. Ugh. Why hasn’t someone developed a tool that can run over your skin and “scan” your blood and automatically read the test results. I’m going to invent that.
Either that or get a prescription for Valium.